Friday, August 14, 2009

What not to do with a Rottie Puppy.......


What not to do with a Rottweiler puppy.......

Hemi is high energy; me on the other hand? I'm low energy, in fact this week very low energy. Just want to vegetate and get over this nasty stuff that I have had for 7 days to long.

Hemi must be trained every day no less then 6 days a week. So me in my infinite wisdom decided I would cheat on his training, Yep, kind of break the rules to suite me. So I have this treadmill; I have a brain storm and yes everyone could smell something burning, it was my brain on overload.

I had decided to put Hemi on it a few times a day and then it would keep him in training right? Now I know they use treadmills for dogs all the time, one would think it would be very simple Right? You put the dog on it and they walk or run, whatever the case may be, it’s not rocket science, simple one would think right?

YEAH RIGHT! I was thinking all I had to do was put his 80lb body on it, turn it on and Wa La! Instant dog exerciser! Ha! I couldn't have been more wrong! Now the first thing that I forgot to check was the speed setting. (Hey in my defense I was running a fever of one hundred ninety, I was delirious with fever).

Now you can go mock ninety on these contraptions, or you go as low as would like. Yes that is right, my daughter was jogging on it the night before!

Now Hemi does not do treadmill or at least he had no concept of a treadmill; he had never been on one or seen one before! And all I thought I would have to was to put him on it, tell him to stay, turn it on for 30 minutes at two miles per hour and hey, instant exercised dog! Not happening; not any way; not at any time!

Have you ever seen a rottie fly? They can you know! So here I am, feeling like I'm going to cough up a lung and I know I’m on deaths door it was only a matter of time, and my need to care for my doggies was far more important then my impending death!!

So let me set this up for you; just humor me, please? I have this dog on the treadmill he has never been on a treadmill before and I decide it time to take some of the load off me with this brain dead dog that has no concept of what stay, sit or anything else for that matter means. Scott (my eldest son) is outside in the garage, Amberly (My eldest daughter) is in her room.

So I place Hemi on the treadmill and he sits and stares at me like I just had a cup of stupid. I tell him to stay and support his back end so he is standing; I stand back and observe my rocket science moment and with great pride.

I think Ok I’m brilliant; the dog’s trainers will now be coming to me for advice. Who knows maybe I can have my own TV show and make millions with my ingenious self, I take great pride in patting myself on the back for this beyond clever moment in my life.

I take one last look at my accomplishment and am so proud of myself, and with one last pat on my back, I push the start button. Ok now let’s think about this, I am delirious with fever (hey that’s the best I could come up with in my defense) and obviously this was not well thought out or I would not have a story to tell you.

So I push the start button Hemi comes flying off the treadmill, the speed was set at ten miles an hour really fast for something that has no concept of what in the world he was suppose to be doing in the first place. Now Hemi comes flying off the treadmill, he was launched up the stairs, he rolls back down the stairs, tries to right himself hits the banister and gets up and falls into the end table off the sofa where there is a lamp, (Not any more) and my hot tea and my bagel and my mail, (again I say; not any longer) so down runs Amberly, In runs Scott wondering what the hell just happened.

I take my time explain the logistic of my idea to help me train Hemi to the treadmill, No hour walk, I say. Hemi treadmill, so simple! it was working so well in my mind, I said to them, and Hemi just would not cooperate, dumb dog! NOT EVEN ON YOUR BEST DAY! Says Scott, Scott looks at Amberly, Amberly looks at me, both are shaking their heads and both at the very same moment say in exasperation CHEMO BRAIN! (Yeah, that is my excuse for everything now). So now we have a seven month old 80lb rottie that is terrified of the treadmill.

Now in my defense I really did not think it was rocket science, but I guess I must really be suffering from chemo brain, and of course that fever from hell, because I really thought all I had to do was tell him to stay and walk Just that simple!

So now when I get feeling better I must introduce the treadmill in positive manner to Hemi. I think I may have put months of work on me, trying to takes months of work off me. When all I wanted to do was to not have to train him until I felt better. Was that asking too much?

And that was day and how was yours?

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